The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
