I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
