oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
areolas are like halos for boobs.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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