dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize
