her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
