Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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