I wish my penis had an off switch
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize