I feel like I'm in dance class right now
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Randomize
