He is such a slut. More and more my type.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
