drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
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