I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I just forgot I was standing up.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
