There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
Randomize
