My room smells like vodka and shame
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
