We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
