yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
our cab driver is having phone sex.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
