You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
