I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
