did you get engaged???
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
