One girl and one boy is just not enough.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
