I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
