Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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