I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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