Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
