I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
