two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Randomize
