I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
