We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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