They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
