The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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