Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
