Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
