rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
