I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
