she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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