my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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