Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
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