Whod you bang
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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