Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
she looked like the before picture.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Randomize
