sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize