Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Randomize
