FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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