Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize