Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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