I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
