At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Randomize
