do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
