I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I think my moral compass just broke
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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