So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize