I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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