why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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