Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
